I want my son to see a healthy home.
joy.
love.
I want him to hear
"I am so glad you exist"
instead of thinking I regret bringing him into this world.
I want,
more than I want my own happiness,
for him to feel safe.
strong.
unafraid.
I have been afraid for
26 years.
Afraid of being homeless.
hungry.
cold.
Afraid of being alone.
I have always said,
"Do not stay in impossible relationships 'for the kids'."
And I stand by that.
But I understand the impulse.
-----------------------------------
I learned how not to parent.
Don't have an abusive husband.
Don't be an alcoholic.
Don't abandon your children.
Don't lie.
But that kind of knowledge only leaves a void.
A child is a vessel that gets filled
with dreams
(theirs, and yours)
and ideas.
A lacking is not,
By definition,
And I do not want him
To be filled with emptiness.
No comments:
Post a Comment